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Forgive but not Forget

8 Differences Between True Love and Fake Love - Women's Love Advices
    A common phrase would be ‘forgive and forget’ but not like anything I’m going to share today. At some point in life we go through denial. We even have been treated badly by others. We face incidents that scar us for a life time.
    I’m not saying forgiving is easy but it is possible. Forgetting however is next to impossible because it becomes a constant reminder for you. For instance, during high school we were bullied by some notorious gangsters in your school. Over time you just let go that hatred and eventually you forgive but that painful memory does remain in your mind. Most of us as kids were taught by our parents to forgive and let go. But does that really work? Does that leave you without any impact?
    I strongly urge that you shouldn’t forget whatever incident you go through. I say this is because they become a lesson for you. They prevent you from being a victim again. The next time you face any similar situation, you would know how to handle it.   
    At one point in life, I realized I was surrounded by fake people. I was living up to their standards and not mine. I tried to please them. I thought it was all part of pleasing them. Those I call as friends weren’t really being a friend, especially during desperate and helpless time. At times I thought it was ok. I didn’t look at it seriously. I repeated forgive and forget whatever they did and without my realization, I was only storing up hurt.
     But then, one day, I realize that being treated that way is never ok. Being turned down and betrayed was definitely not ok. The pain and agony I went through after knowing the truth, was really unbearable. All this while, I was the one allowing the hurt to overwhelm me and I was ok with them hurting me over and over again. Honestly I didn’t have the heart to forgive. I began hating them for it. Every time I see them near me I just get angry. I was so angry that I feel like hitting them or yelling at them. But then, I came to my sense that forgiving is not just for them but it is for myself as well. Forgiving allows you to heal. It gives you inner peace because you let go off that hatred and pain. But forgetting that incident is never going to happen because it became a lesson for me. I learnt that not everyone is genuine. Some just put a mask around you and play nice when actually they aren’t.
    If you happen to face similar situation or anything worse, it is ok for you to not forget because it actually helps you save yourself from trouble. But if you are someone who forgive as well as forget, I am not against that. It is also a good thing. It might seem like a bad thing but think about it for a moment. You forgive but you absorb the lesson you got by not forgetting it and that lesson will help you in any sort of situation you face. In a bad situation we can’t see the good but that doesn’t mean there’s any.
    This is my point of you. How about you? Do you agree with or you think forgetting is the best choice? Do share in the comment below.
 By: Abia Iris

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